In this week’s episode, Billy and Brian take the summer sessions outside to celebrate their birthdays on Brian’s patio!
Billy and Brian discuss:
--updates on how they’re progressing in their podcast
--where they were a year ago vs. today
--Billy doing future episodes on solo
--Brian’s growth as a person, husband, dad, and musician over the past year
–Brian's never before heard stories about being shot in the face and almost getting abducted
--the importance of prioritizing your goals
--what the future has in store for Brian on the Bass
Check out these previous episodes:
--Episode 58-How to Make Being Selfish Work for You by Val Jones
--Summer Sessions 3-Billy’s Minnesota Nice Experience at the Cayuna Gnome Home in the Small Town of Crosby
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Billy: Welcome to The Mindful Midlife Crisis Summer Sessions. I’m your host, Billy. As always, I'm joined by my good friend, Brian on the Bass. Brian, how you doing over there, man?
Brian: I am full today.
Brian: Full — as in full of love, life, happiness.
Billy: And meat?
Brian: And meat.
Brian: Oh, lots of meat.
Billy: We had our August birthday meat sweats luncheon today, and it was glorious. Thank you to the wonderful people at Pittsburgh Blue in Edina. Very, very delicious.
Brian: Oh, yeah. Everything was great, as per usual.
Billy: Yeah, it's a good time. If you listen to the Summer Session 3 with my good friend Mitch Fallgatter, Mitch and I have been doing this meat sweats luncheon now I think for 12 or 13 years. We can't remember. We've just keep expanding it out to other awesome people who have August birthdays, because the reality is the best people were born in August.
Brian: This is the case. I mean, I'm sorry. Everybody else born everywhere else, you had to find out this way. But it's true.
Billy: Definitely, no shortage of ego with those of us born in August. Because we're Leos, and we just know we're the kings.
Brian: We have to show off. I know.
Billy: Exactly. Hey, if you're wondering why it might sound a little bit different this time around. It's because, for the first time since March, Brian and I are in person with each other. We're sitting across from each other.
Brian: That is true. Oh my gosh. We haven't done that in a long time.
Billy: No, we haven't done that in a long time, and we have also never done an episode outside. Considering it's the Summer Sessions, we need to feature Minnesota summers because we do complain a lot about the weather here. But it is a top 10 day here in Minnesota. So, we're sitting outside at Brian's backyard, and it is beautiful here. You might hear a water bubbler in the background going on.
Brian: An airplane. I'm actually watching an airplane fly over right now over the cloud. It's gorgeous.
Billy: Yeah, the skies are blue. There are a couple of clouds up there.
Brian: No fogs.
Billy: Yeah, it is beautiful here. This is why we live in Minnesota. This is why we put up with the bullshit of winter.
Brian: This is it, man.
Billy: It's for days like this. I might even go paddle boarding tonight because it is a full moon.
Brian: I was going to ask you, where are you storing your paddle board? I want to get one. But if you need a place to put it, you could put it here so I could use it.
Billy: Do you just want to buy my paddle board?
Brian: I'd like to do that, yeah.
Billy: Because I'm not going to need it in Korea.
Brian: Let's talk after the show.
Billy: That sounds like a good idea. We may have solved the storage issue here for me. I feel like one of those guys on the streets, like, "What you need? What you need? What you need over here?"
Brian: This is rad. Let's do it. Because I got to do it once this summer when I was at my sister's. I'm like, "This is really quite fun."
Billy: You see what I've been talking about?
Brian: Yes, I would love to be on a mini talk on one of those.
Billy: Yeah, I got you covered. We can work this out. We can definitely work this out. Hey, we want to say thank you to everybody who's been listening to the Summer Session, so far. The last five episodes have been really really popular. The top 10 countries where our show has been downloaded look like this. There's a three-way tie for number 10 with Brazil, Switzerland, and Ireland. Number 9, a tie between Hong Kong and India. Then it goes like this. As we round out the top 10, Egypt, Mexico — I'm sure that people in Mexico enjoyed the episode that we did on Puerto Vallarta. That's Summer Session 2 if you want to go and listen to that — Germany coming in hot. Thank you to, Germany. Australia continues to crush it. Canada — thank you, Canada, our neighbors to the north, the United Kingdom, South Korea — obviously, I'm huge in South Korea now after being —
Brian: Of course, you did a promotional tour.
Billy: Yeah, exactly. In fact, I'm so popular they asked me to come back.
Brian: That's amazing, Billy. Wow. Congratulations, bud.
Billy: Oh, the delusions of grandeur continue here. Of course, the United States is number one. Thank you to all our stateside listeners. We really, really appreciate it. Hey, if you want a shout out, send us a message at firstname.lastname@example.org or follow us on Instagram @mindful_midlife_crisis. You can also go to www.mindfulmidlifecrisis.com and click on the contact page, and hit us up there. We're also on Twitter @mindfulmidlife. We're on Facebook at The Mindful Midlife Crisis Podcast. You can find all of this in our show notes and on our website.
If you do go to our website, be sure to sign up for our weekly newsletter under contact. We send out different mindfulness meditations each Sunday, along with information about upcoming events hosted by our amazing guests. We're always seeking out opportunities to help people reflect, learn, and grow. Right now, you can check out information from our guests, Kolin Purcell and Anna Schlegel. They just bought that property in Ecuador that they were talking about. They're opening up what's called 'The B.E.L.L Center.' Check that out on Instagram. You can get information about the Women's Retreat hosted by Jill Dahler, who we talked to last week, and Val Jones — that's episode 58, I believe. That actually sold out now that I think about it. So, you might need to contact them if you're interested in that.
Then you can also take a look at how you can help out Jesse Ross fund his project as well. All of those are in that newsletter. People just looking to help others reflect, learn and grow. Hey, get this. I'm also working on some helpful content and sharing those resources for absolutely free, because that's the kind of guy I am.
Brian: You're putting it out there in the universe, Billy. They don't come back to you, buddy.
Billy: Exactly. I appreciate that. Thank you. Yes, I'm trying to put some goodness out in the world and help you navigate the complexities and possibilities of life's second half.
Brian: The world definitely needs more goodness right now.
Billy: Agreed. I agree. I'm also looking for some people interested in getting some free mindfulness coaching and free daily planning coaching with me. So, if that piques your curiosity, be sure to sign up for the newsletter at www.mindfulmidlifecrisis.com. All the dogs are barking because they're excited about it as well. Also, I know some of you are concerned, like, "Wait, if Brian is leaving the show, what does that mean? Does that mean that we're not going to find out when Gen X Jukebox is playing?" Do you think I'm gonna sell out Brian like that? Hell no. Of course, I'm gonna promote Brian's band, Gen X Jukebox. Because they're a heck of a lot of fun, and you need to go check them out. You've got two big dates coming up here at the Minnesota State Fair. Are you ready to rock at Dino's Gyros' stage on Friday, August 26 and Monday, September 5th?
Brian: Most definitely. We're just talking about our costumes for that. We're doing some fun stuff with the costumes, and we're also going over the logistics. Because the logistics of an event like this are a lot harder than you think.
Billy: I can imagine, but you are the man. You teased last week. You gave us a little teaser last week at the beginning of the episode. You teased again here with this costume thing. Now I don't like the State Fair, but I go to the State Fair to support you. Now I'm actually kind of looking forward to the State Fair, because you teased this new costume thing.
Brian: It's going to be fun. That show is going to be pandemonium, man. It's going to be crazy. We have been now consistently driving crowds crazy wherever we go. So, we feel the show is getting to a point where it's great. But we're still going to keep working on it throughout the end of the year. So, our plan right now is to just work on it through the end of the year. Next year will be an incredible show. Well, we'll really have it perfected by then. But, I mean, we've only been around since April. So, this thing is brand new. We had no idea it was gonna take off like this. So, we're now, like, "Well, we should get the rest of the show done."
Billy: Who knows? You might be huge in South Korea someday.
Brian: We would come over and play South Korea in a second, although one of our singers does not fly. We'd have to put him on a boat, or we would have to drug him 18 stuff. We've been thinking about doing that, the B.A. Barrachus. His name is Kurt. Kurt, if you ever hear this, I'm sorry but the cat is out of the bag. He doesn't fly.
Billy: Oh, that is funny.
Brian: So, we're going to have to knock him out.
Billy: Oh my god.
Brian: But it's okay. His girlfriend is in the band, and we're just going to get her to do it.
Billy: Yeah. Oh, that's excellent. Well, hey, if you're not a state fair person like me and you wouldn't be caught dead at the state fair, you can also rock out with Gen X Jukebox at the Red Rocks of Minnesota, Champps in Eden Prairie on Saturday, September 3. That way you can get your Alan Jackson, C+C Music Factory, Backstreet Boys, Gin Blossoms, and Nirvana fixed. High energy show, obviously, with costumes. It's going to remind you why the 90s produced the greatest music of all time. We say it every week, because we believe it. Because there's no arguing this point. You want to know what, Brian? No one has challenged us on this yet.
Brian: I'm going to take it on a different angle at it here, too. I'm going to say, for certain, even if somebody would argue with the statement you just said, there's no possible way that you can. The last great decade of music was the 90s. 100%.
Billy: I wholeheartedly agree. I wholeheartedly —
Brian: The most recent, greatest decade in music is the 90s.
Billy: Absolutely. So, if that's your jam, give them a follow on Facebook and Instagram. Go get funky with Brian on the Bass. You might see me there cutting up a rug as well. It is a damn good time. Once again, we'd like to say thank you to our podcast production team over at Podcast Engineers.
Brian: Thank you.
Billy: Shout out to Dave and his team working hard. They make us sound professional each and every single week. We started working with them during the Summer Sessions. They do editing of our episodes, they write up show notes, they write up transcripts, they make cool audio grams that we post on Instagram. We're finally taking this podcasting business seriously so much so, Brian, that I have been booked on five different podcasts as a guest. That is all coming up this fall and winter. I cannot wait to share those episodes with all of you as listeners. So, thank you to Podcast Engineers for your support and making us sound a little bit more professional.
If you have been liking the show, if you want to support this show, be sure to follow or subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. If you're listening on Apple podcast, what you need to do is click that little plus sign in the upper right-hand corner, or if you're a Spotify user, click follow under our cover art. That way, you will never miss an episode. Also, you can go to the show notes and click on 'leave us a review' and leave us a five-star review. You have to follow us first. You have to subscribe to us first, and then you can leave the five-star review. Even if you're not a regular listener and you've only listened to an episode here and there, tell us what you liked about your favorite episode. Maybe your favorite episode was Episode 33 with Ericka Jones. So, you can just write something as simple as, "I really enjoyed Episode 33 with Ericka Jones about why diversity, equity, and inclusion makes us a better society." When you leave us a five-star review like that, not only does it help others find the show but it also fills our hearts with happiness and joy. It also makes the dogs bark, too. They get excited when you leave reviews.
Brian: No, it's the mailman that makes the dog barks.
Billy: Oh, yeah. There he is.
Brian: That's a classic story, folks — the mailman and the dogs, if you can hear that. I doubt that's even on tape.
Billy: Yeah, they're definitely getting after that mailman over there. But the best way to support this show is to share it with others. Be sure to tag us. If you share it on your Instagram, tag us @mindful_midlife_crisis. If you use Twitter, tag us @mindfulmidlife. If you're on Facebook, tag us at The Mindful Midlife Crisis Podcast. Be sure to follow us on those social media accounts because we're super cool.
So, last week, we talked to life coach Jill Dahler. Jill is about to become my new business partner. We're going to go on this endeavor together to help people reflect, in a way that develops self-awareness so that they can live a more purpose-filled life. Listen, this is the work that I've been doing on myself the last few months. I have gained a lot of clarity on which direction I want my life to go in the next few years. So, this week, I thought we'd check in with Brian since his birthday was August 1st and my birthday is tomorrow, August 12th. We're recording this on the 11th. We only have two more episodes left together before I take this little project solo. So, first of all, Brian, happy birthday to you.
Brian: Happy birthday to you, too, as yours is tomorrow.
Billy: Thank you. I appreciate that. How did you celebrate your birthday?
Brian: Well, I worked. I shouldn't have done that, but I did. Then when I got home, Leanne had barbecue prepared for me so much. Oh my god. It was so much that I had a birthday feast like seven or eight days. After the birthday feast, it was like, "I think I'll go with the leftover brisket today. We'll do sandwiches. Then I'll go with the pork this time, and we'll do a salad with some pork cut." So, we just made that barbecue just last throughout the entire week. It was spectacular. Then they got me just some other good food. We all sat around and had fun.
Billy: Are you a birthday cake guy?
Brian: Yeah, most definitely.
Billy: What did you get?
Brian: I like white cake, white frosting.
Billy: Did you ever get a Dairy Queen cake back in the day?
Brian: Oh, yeah, definitely. Yeah, those ice cream cakes are good, too. But I don't know. I just like white, white as far as cake goes. But I'll eat marble, I'll eat chocolate. It's just white, white is my preferred. But it's got to have the sprinkles on it. I'll take the candy and sprinkles all day, too, though.
Billy: Real nice. Real nice. I'm not a big birthday cake guy. But if you put carrot cake or cheesecake in front of me —
Brian: Oh, cheese cake is great. Yeah, I'm a big cheesecake.
Billy: It's a done deal. So, we actually recorded an episode called a 'Billy and Brian Get Older' a year ago. This episode is called a 'Billy and Brian Get Older Again.' We talked about some of the goals that we had for this podcast. So, what I wanted to do here is I just wanted to give some updates about how we are progressing. Because I feel pretty good about what's happening here. So, let's talk about where we were a year ago, and how we have grown as a show.
So, a year ago, we had 25 published episodes. Now we have 70 episodes, including the Summer Sessions. So, I'm including that in the total. A year ago, we had 4,800 downloads. We now have 23,000 downloads. Our goal is 45,000 by the end of the year. We're a little behind on that, but here's the good news. We were averaging 180 downloads per episode a year ago. We are now up to 311.
Brian: That's incredible.
Billy: Yes. So, thank you to all you listeners out there. We really, really appreciate it.
Brian: You guys are awesome.
Billy: Yeah, you guys are awesome. So, continue listening, continue sharing. That's how it grows. We hope that we're making valuable content for you. That's our charge. When we see numbers like this, it motivates us and me — especially since I'm taking this out on my own — to continue delivering quality content, to continue having experts in their field. Because that's what we want to introduce you to. We want to provide you with a bunch of resources.
Because here's the thing, a lot of these professionals out there, they might seem inaccessible, right? But when you have a smaller podcast like this, we're able to connect it to all sorts of accessible people. Take, for example, when we had Michelle Pan on. She heard the episode with Kari Schwear, and she reached out to her. Now the two of them are working together. I've had Jill Dahler tell me that a couple of different clients learned about her through our show. Some people have signed up for the Women's Retreat because of our show. Kari Schwear has had at least one person work with her because of our show. So, we're doing something right. So, the more people that you share this with, the more people we can help out. Ultimately, that is our goal.
Brian: I'm going to pull back the curtain for a moment here. In case there's audience members out there that think the show's quality may suffer or be changed by me not being a part of the show, I'm just going to let you guys know that Billy has done the majority. He has done 99% of what this podcast is, you guys. He really has. It's been all him the whole time. I have been in here in an advisory capacity and having fun with my friend. If you're worried about the quality — in fact, you know what? I think now, more than ever, the quality is going to go up, because I won't be holding Billy back so much.
Billy: But one thing that people say is it's the dynamic between the two of us. Because we have so much fun.
Brian: That dynamic will always exist. You know I'll always come back anytime you need me. So, it's not that's going away. I'll be here anytime you call.
Billy: That warms my heart. You might be surprised that call may come sooner than you expect it or than you want.
Brian: I will be right here if you need me, brother.
Billy: I appreciate that. You have been insanely busy since you got back from your Fourth of July vacation with the family. So, most importantly, how are you feeling? You good?
Brian: I have never had been having more fun in my entire life. I'm extremely fortunate. It just makes me want to try to figure out how I can help other people, too. You know what I mean? I've been blessed with all this stuff and privileged with all this stuff. I don't mean physical stuff, either. When I say stuff, I don't mean stuff — a wonderful family and all that stuff. So, I'm wonderful. I'm very much enjoying life right now.
Billy: Excellent. I thought it would be fun for us to go all the way back to Episode 1. Because we always have our guests talk about their 10 roles.
Billy: And we did that, too. We introduced ourselves being the 10 roles. So, I thought let's go back and take a look at those 10 roles. So, your 10 roles that you listed were: father, husband, son, brother, musician, exercise enthusiast, scientist, engineer, electrician, president, and friend. The three roles that you said you're most looking forward to in the second half of life are: husband, dad, and musician. So, here's a question for you. In the past year, in what way have you grown as a husband?
Brian: Oh, my gosh. Many. My wife and I have never had more open communication than we do now. With the stressors of children and the pandemic and stuff like that, you can grow apart. It's very easy to do that, especially with what both of us have going on. But that hasn't happened. In fact, it's quite the opposite. We are very purposeful now about making time for each other. Not only that, both of us are very — it's an exciting time in our relationship, because we're getting out of toddlerhood now.
Billy: Oh, yeah.
Brian: Ben is old enough. Mason is old enough that he can watch Ben, and we can leave them alone. We went out to dinner for the first time together — just she and I — in a long, long time, this last Friday. So, we are totally both psyched about what's going on in our lives because now we know we get that — because when you have three children, especially little children, it is super hard to find that time to be together. If you do have the time, either you're too tired or you're not in the mood for feeling that closeness because you're like, "God, I just want people to stop talking to me right now." You know what I mean? That's because that's what kids do. It's like bat, bat, bat, bat. But that hasn't happened to us. We've really weathered the storm, as far as the young children goes. She and I are super excited about getting some of that time back now. Of course, now we're going to have teenagers. We're both excited about that and the possibilities and stuff that could bring.
Billy: Well, we're going to talk about your kids growing into teenagers here in a little bit, too. But what do you attribute this growth to? What do you attribute this closeness, this connection to in the last year? Because you're saying that in the past year —
Brian: Purposeful communication.
Billy: Oh, talk more about that. What does that look like for the two of you?
Brian: I mean, we do check ins all the time. How are you doing? Everything good? Are we all right? We're constantly in tune with each other. That's important. We're at great partnership. Communication in that partnership is the key.
Billy: I wonder sometimes if raising children — and you can speak to this. Do you feel like sometimes raising children almost feels like a business, in that you're doing tasks and you forget the human element to check in with your partner? Do you think that that may — not for you.
Brian: It can happen. I could see that. Yeah, of course, I could see how someone could feel taken for granted. I think it is just being in tune with your partner's needs. You got to know when they've reached that point. Then you got to know what to do to help them. Expect to keep giving. You know what I mean? That's what I would say. But again, in our relationship, I feel satisfaction in providing emotional support for her and physical support. You know what I mean? Hey, drive this kid there. I know that's my part in the family, so it's very rewarding. You know what I mean? For me, it's not hard.
Billy: Yeah. Anytime you've talked about it, you've made it sound easy. The thing is, just having been friends for going on 11 years, however long we've been friends, the two of you make it look easy, too. You really do. As an outsider, you guys make it look easy.
Brian: We have a weird thing, Billy. It's very odd what me and my wife have, and it's very special. I mean, our minds are in tune with each other. We have weird things happen, outside of things like her grandpa's birthday is my birthday, and my grandma's birthday is her birthday. Same. We have all kinds of weird stuff like that that happens. I mean, even down to aches and pains, where it's like my knee's aching, and I go, "Oh, you're going to get a knee ache in a day or two." Sure enough, it happens. It's just like weird stuff like that. But we have a thing where our minds are together even when we're not together. I don't know how to explain it.
Billy: So, I imagine that in tune-ness resonates as a parent. So in what way have you grown as a dad in the past year?
Brian: Well, it has to be purposeful. One way I've grown is, no matter how much you try, it's always hard to treat your children equally. That is something you really have to strive for. Being in tune with each of their individual needs and not necessarily like, "Oh, he's a boy. He should be doing—" That, I've had to figure out a little bit more this year. You know what I mean? As their personalities develop, I have to remind myself that, "Wait a minute, maybe you shouldn't deal with Charlie like you're dealing with Mason."
Billy: So, you're being more equitable than equal?
Brian: Yes, equitable. Thank you. Addressing each of their needs individually and not at just as a group, I guess.
Billy: So, then how do you get to know their individual needs? I mean, obviously, it's through spending time and having conversation with them.
Brian: Yeah, and we do a specific time. Like, I took Charlie on a trip to Disney. Nobody else. It was just me and Charlie. Mason and I are currently— we have a project going on. He wanted to learn DMX lighting. So, I said, "Okay, let's do it." So, he and I are doing the lighting programming for Gen X right now.
Billy: Wait. Your son?
Billy: Your 11-, 12-year-old son is doing lighting for your band?
Billy: Because I remember seeing a little post where he was just getting into it and was helping out. He did one of the parties around here.
Brian: Oh, no. He's done sound for us in a live show.
Billy: Oh my god.
Brian: He's 12. He's brilliant. He is absolutely brilliant. He knows how to do sound. He knows how to do lighting. So, yeah.
Billy: Wow. Does that make you, as a musician dad, a proud papa?
Brian: Honestly, him being happy is the only thing I care about. I don't care if he gets into music or he doesn't. I just hope he finds happiness. You know what I mean? I'm not the kind of person that's going to impose my happiness and say it's going to fit for you, too. You know what I mean? He has to find that out. My charge as a parent is just to foster what he clings onto. You know what I mean? So, it just happened. Yeah, he wanted to do the play at school, and he got involved in the tech crew. Now he enjoys doing that stuff. So, he and I enjoy doing it together.
Billy: I think that's a testament to you as a parent because your son wants to spend time with you. He wants to see you in action. I think that speaks to you being a good role model, and Leanne being a good role model, and the two of you together being good role models for each other. Because Leanne does a lot of the photography for your band. So, you're a full team working together all the time.
Brian: Yeah, we are. We are. We really are.
Billy: It's so impressive. I think that is something that our audience will miss a little bit, it's hearing just what kind of team you are. How have you grown as a musician? Because that was one of the three that you were most looking forward to? How have you grown as a musician in the past year?
Brian: Oh, that's a great question. Well, I've written a lot of songs. That's something I want to do more of yet. I have a really good album in me yet. I know this, of original music. I have a really good album of original music in me. Because I've written upwards around 4 or 500 songs. There's got to be 10 good ones in there. But it is probably only one good there. Over this last year, it's just been the development of Gen X Jukebox, really. I am pushing myself further than I've ever pushed myself, as far as the show goes. When you add costuming, and lighting, and video, and tracks, and all this stuff layered upon a show, it gets to be a lot. We're pushing. We're going to do all of it. So, this is going to be a really impressive show. It's going to be — we're already proud of it. But next year, it's going to be something to behold.
Billy: I can't wait. I'm so excited to see how this band grows. Of those three, which are you the most proud of?
Brian: Father, 100%.
Billy: Tell us more. Why is that?
Brian: I think that's what I was born to do, man. I mean, I'm a musician. Also, I was born to do that. But I have never had feelings of the depth that I've had other than things associated around fatherhood, like the birth of my children. I mean, that is profoundly soul changing. You know what I mean? I've had moments like that in music, but not to the depth of when you see your infant son's little tiny fingers for the first time and you're like, "Holy shit." That's powerful. So, I don't think anything will ever come close to that — helping guide and mold another generation of humans and hoping they turn out well. It's a big task, and it's scary.
Billy: Yes, I do not envy that role. That's why I did not take it on.
Brian: Billy, it is. I mean, it's rewarding. But it is, especially when you look at the current state of the world. You're like, "Oh, my gosh. What did I do?" You do the best you can at any given time, man. That's all you can do.
Billy: It sounds like you haven't reproduced in the way people. You haven't reproduced people who are going to be ridiculous. It sounds like you have created three fine, young gentleman who are on the up and up and will be productive members of the society. Again, I think it's a testament to you and Leanne as parents. In what way — just in general, and I'm not talking about those three things. Just in general, in what way, what area, would you like to grow?
Brian: A husband has been a blast lately. Because, as I said earlier, we're really excited. I'm super looking forward to that. Because now Leanne can go to the shows with me. She's not able to do that now. But soon, she'll be able to go with me. Whenever we travel and do that stuff, she'll be with me. She loves that stuff. Not to mention, she's actually our social media manager, which is also, yeah — it helps if you're there. Then father, again, I've been excited just because I feel each of the boys and I are in tune as well. We have great relationships and we're developing those and working on them all the time. Then the band is going great. I'm just blessed in all three. You know what I mean, man? I'm just really looking forward to what's going to happen.
Billy: Is there an area outside of those three where you'd like to grow?
Brian: I want to do so many things. I want to travel. I got an album to write yet. I got a book probably in me, too. I've got a book, eventually. I don't know if it's going to be a tell all or I'll just make a story out.
Billy: At one point in time, I almost had a segment called Brian Stories. But then, I also knew that that was going to be a 20-minute segment because —
Brian: Every time — I've got a few. You know what? I don't know if I'm ever going to bottle those stories. Maybe that'd be my podcast. It's just do the stories, just tell my stories.
Billy: Well, Dave Grohl has Storytellers or whatever that book is, Dave Grohl Stories or Dave's True Stories, right?
Brian: I don't even know he had that.
Billy: I haven't read the book yet, but it's Dave Grohl. Dave Grohl, if you're out there listening, there is a spot for you on this podcast. I would invite you back for that episode. If I ever get Dave Grohl or Henry Rollins, you're going to be back on the show.
Brian: Two stories I've never told. I got shot in the face one time.
Brian: I got shot in the face.
Billy: I have never heard this story.
Brian: I know. Because I haven't told it. It's, honest to god, true story. I almost got abducted once when I was in about third grade.
Billy: Are we going to tell these stories now?
Brian: Do you want me to tell them? I'll do it if you want me to. But is this The Storyteller's episode or not?
Billy: Listen, this is your last episode. I mean, we're doing another episode next week. But this episode is about you. So, yes, I want to hear both of these stories. We can't just leave our audience hanging like that. So, yes.
Brian: It was my first job, and I was 12 years old. It had to be around that time. Let me think. It had to be. Yes, sixth, seventh grade. This is the story when I got shot in the face. I worked at a trap club. They used to make us, back in those days — this would have been '87, '86. Anyway, they stuck us down in the trap houses to put the clay birds in the launcher. So, that was our job. That's what they paid us for. But that's not where I got shot in the face. I was actually walking. I was walking at the club at that job, and I was shooting. I was at a shoot. Standing away from everybody, I think I was in between the parking lot where the trap houses are, and I just hear this. You know how you hear air moving? I heard it in my left ear, and then I felt a little sting on my cheek. I then proceeded to reach in my mouth, and I pulled out one of those BBs.
Billy: Did it go through your cheek?
Brian: It went right through my cheek. I was like, "What the fu**?" Because you hear boom, and then you hear the pain. I felt the pain really quick. I'm lucky my mouth was open, because it landed on the side by my tongue. I was like, I literally put in my hand and looked at it. It was one of the pellets from a shotgun shell that you shoot trap with. It hit me in the face. It went through the cheek. So, I just slapped a bandaid on it.
Billy: Did you ever find out who did it?
Brian: No. How could you? I was away from the trap houses. It must have been the ricochet, perfect off of something that hit me in the cheek.
Billy: Oh my god. Okay. So, now tell the story about the time you almost got abducted.
Brian: It was in Milwaukee. I lived on Van Norman Avenue, at the intersection of Van Norman and Vermont. I used to go over to my buddy, Jeff Nervi's house. Jeff Nervi lived down the block across the street to the east and down a block, like at the end of that block, across the street. I was probably had to be in the third grade. I left Jeff's house, and I started walking towards my house. This car pulls up. Because that side of the street was close. A car pulls up. Guy throws open — it was one of those big door cars back in the '70s, the big door cars with like the — it's a single door like a cutlass type. You know what I mean?
Billy: Oh yeah.
Brian: It has a huge front seat and tiny back seats, but it's all one door. He throws that door open, and he holds out these Tums in a package that was open. He goes, "Hey, come here. I got some candy." I'm looking at him. I'm smart enough and told him that's fucking Tums, man. That's not candy. Even if that was candy, I don't think he would have got me. Because I remember thinking this is fucked up.
Billy: Stranger danger.
Brian: Stranger danger, right? So, I was like, nope, and I baulked. I mean, I baulked and he's like, "Go back." He was like, "It was Tums." He was some creepy old dude, too. He had to have been probably 50s.
Billy: That was a fun little trip down memory.
Brian: But I was smart enough to run away, and I was close enough to home. I got home. It was like, what? I don't think I ever told anybody about that either. Because it was back in the '70s, you know I mean? Yeah.
Billy: That was a fun little trip down memory right there.
Brian: Those would be a couple. I could also tell you about the time my school got burned down in third grade. That was some kid, Molotov cocktail that one of the sixth grades —
Billy: Oh my god. You have lived a wild life.
Brian: I knew the guy, too. It was weird, man. It was a weird situation.
Billy: So, in the past year, and we've done that looking back into past 40 something years. But in the past year, what's a memory that stands out to you?
Brian: Oh my gosh. I mean, the Gen X. Geez, I have so many. Yellowstone, the Gen X show at Hairball was just great. It was a lot of fun. There's a lot. Other than big trips and big stuff, little accomplishments, like, "Hey, I'm feeling better than I've ever felt before in my life." I'm not even working out now. I'm just eating right. That helps. I've changed that. I've stopped working out now pretty much.
Billy: Oh, really? How come?
Brian: I don't know. Winter, I usually took a break and I've just never resumed. But I really decided to concentrate on nutrition and change that a lot. As you can see, it's working because I still look like I work out, and I don't.
Billy: Are you worried, though, about losing muscle mass as you age? Because everyone we talked to, Aaron Boike in Episode 50 or 51, he talked about the importance of as we age that we need to make sure that we're continuing to strength train, and we need to develop hypertrophy training. Because each decade, we lose muscle mass. You're 49. You're entering into the next decade here in a year.
Brian: Yeah, that is true. So, I will have to come up with a regular strength program and, probably, flexibility I want to work on, too. Because those are the two things you lose when you get old. So, I got to get another 10 years out of this thing yet, on this body.
Billy: It's funny that you bring up strength training, because that was one of the big goals that I had this past year. I wanted to focus on my fitness. I've been fit my whole time, too, but I just wanted to be consistent with it. So, I wanted to strength train at least twice a week for an entire year. I didn't hit that one. But these are all pretty lofty fitness goals that I had.
Brian: They were. Yeah, absolutely.
Billy: Yeah, I practice yoga at least 30 minutes a week. I didn't hit that complete reset recovery corrective exercise at least once a week. I didn't do that.
Brian: That was pandemic, though. As soon as we got out of pandemic, I think that's what blew your plan. You know what I mean? What else could you focus on?
Billy: Yeah, exactly. When I got out of the pandemic, I'm like, "I'm going to get into the best shape of my life." But then when I started traveling, this really complicated it. I didn't know. That was the thing — it's I didn't know how to schedule my day when I had so much free time while I was traveling. Now that's why I want to help people with the daily schedule planning, because now I have things down to the minute just like I used to back when I was working in school. Because like I said, I always functioned well when I was in school, because bells told me when to start and stop things. Now I'm in this mindset of, okay, it's this time, and this is dedicated time. This is my flex window. I have people who are scheduling sessions with me here and there so that I can be like, okay, I need to do this during this time and promote podcasts, and edit podcasts, and dadadada, so that I'm more productive.
I actually came up with this thing — it's called CHIPS. CHIPS stands for — I don't like to do lists; I like chips list. CHIP stands for complete — these are the things that you absolutely, positively, have to complete today. Then the H stands for hurray because you should celebrate when you complete those things. Then IPS stands for in progress or start. What are things that are in progress, or what are things that you can start today and move along? That way, I prioritize everything by saying these are the things that have to get done today. I need to complete this. If it's a big project, then I'm going to say I'm just going to use a PowerPoint here. But if it's like a 50-slide PowerPoint, I'm going to complete three slides. These slides are the ones. That's how I've been able to manage that time a little better. Ever since I got back from Korea, I have been crushing it.
Brian: Good job.
Billy: I've just been so productive here, lately. But yeah, I had all these things on my list that I wanted to do. There were nine things that were on my list. Of course, me, they're all very hard numbers. I only hit one of the five, which was visit at least five different countries. I still feel good about that. The nice thing is, tomorrow I'll turn 45, and this list will start all over again. I'll try and shoot for it. If I fail, you know what? That's all right. I'll just go back to it and continue on, because life is all about resets.
Brian: Let me ask you this. Of all of your tasks, which of those individually would take the longest?
Billy: Well, they're all one-year tasks. Like, strength train is at least twice a week. I want be able to do that consistently for 52 weeks.
Brian: Because I was looking at it this way. The travel looked like the biggest chunk of time that you'd need to dedicate time.
Billy: Right, and the most financial commitment.
Brian: So, you got the one that took the most time and financial commitment done. So, it was a big one. So, I give you credit.
Billy: Thank you. So, now I need to work on the consistency.
Brian: Now you need to know where you — exactly. That's what I was pointing out. You know you can accomplish the big stuff now.
Billy: Now I hit the consistency, and that's the little stuff. That's where you get 1% better each and every single day. That's a big message that we promote on this podcast. So, let's do this. We're gonna take a quick break. And then when we come back, we're going to talk about what the future lay ahead for Brian on the Bass. Thank you for listening to The Mindful Midlife Crisis.
Billy: Welcome back to The Mindful Midlife Crisis. We're doing our Summer Session Number 8 out on Brian's patio right now because it is a beautiful, beautiful August day here in Minnesota. We wanted to take in a little bit of nature, take in a little bit of the beautiful weather that is outside here today and celebrate our birthdays, and celebrate Brian on the Bass, the best co-host there ever was in the history of co-host.
Brian: I don't know, man. Come on.
Billy: You're right. Actually, Troy Aikman is better.
Brian: He's better.
Billy: Yeah. So, we talked about the past year and what you've accomplished and how you're feeling about that. Now looking ahead, what are some things you're looking forward to as you approach the next decade of life, the 50s? What do the 50s have in store for Brian on the Bass?
Brian: I'm going to rock away the beginning of my 50s, I think, much like I have the rest of my life. That's what I'm going to do, man. I'm just going to have fun. That's what's on my docket. You know what? The whole reason I started Gen X Jukebox is because I said — during the pandemic, I was like, "Man, I don't have a lot of time left to do this stuff." You know what I mean? At my age, I'm thinking, dammit, your body just does not allow you to perform at a certain level after so long. You know what I mean? It's just the bottom line. So, I don't have much time left. If I'm going to do it, I'm just going to do it. So, I want to go out and have fun. I have fun doing it. So, I don't want to miss any opportunity to have that fun anymore. You know what I mean?
Billy: Well, just like you said last week, if you're not having fun in life, what the fuck are you doing?
Brian: That's what I mean. I think that's what the shutdown has really taught me. My whole mindset coming out of the shutdowns was like, "Fuck it, people. Do what you want to do now, because there is no guarantee of a future. " You know what I mean? You got to seize the day.
Billy: Or it's going to be an altered future in some way that's beyond your control. Maybe not even a pandemic, but just something happens that's out of your control, and maybe it gets in the way of something that you want to do. So then, how are you going to find a way to do it? In a sense, bringing back one of our favorite guests, Wendy Battles, this has been your reinvention rebellion right here starting this band.
Brian: Well, I have always done this. But yeah, it kind of was, just because I knew this was going to be the last one I started, too. You know what I mean? Because I'm far enough along in my career. This is the last time I'm going to do a cover, so I want it to be the most fun show I've ever done.
Billy: And just so people understand, too. You've started bands with just, "Hey, you play drums and you play guitar. You know how to sing. Hey, we should start a band, and maybe we can get some gigs." This was not that approach. I remember you called me and you were like, "Hey, I've got this idea for this band, man. We're gonna have sound, we're gonna have production, we're gonna have lights," and you were already buying everything in preparation for this coming out of the pandemic. This was not just a bunch of people getting together and saying, "Hey, we've already got the equipment. Let's go ahead and schedule some shows, and we'll play down at my uncle's bar every once a month," that kind of thing. This is — you put a lot of work into this.
Brian: That is the case, yeah. I mean, most of the other bands I've done have been just buddies of mine. We're having fun doing it, and I've always had fun doing this. But this, I just wanted to make people happy with it, too. That's another thing, man. It's just like there's far too much ugly in the world today. People having fun, even if it's for a couple hours, I think, is more important than ever. People need to come together. All this isolation is not good for people. I mean, you look at what's happening in the world. People have to come together and realize we're more similar than we are different. I think music does that. That's one of the ways that really does it. People coming together to see a band and uniting over a fond memory of the '90s or all that stuff, man, that's what it's about.
Billy: You know what's funny? I can tell that I'm a little out of step with my dance moves. Because when I went and saw you guys at Excelsior, I realized my hips aren't moving the same way. My feet are a little heavier. So, I can tell it's been a few years since I've been out on the dance floor. Because really, I haven't seen live music in the way that I used to see it or in the volume that I used to see it in a long time. If you don't use it, you lose it sort of thing. So, I feel like I need to get more Gen X Jukebox shows because I love to dance. I'm not a great dancer, but I can do enough where bad dancers are like, "Oh, he's pretty good." But if someone who actually knew how to dance saw me dance, they'd be like, "That guy really knows how to fake being a good dancer in front of bad dancers."
Brian: Okay. That's interesting. That's brilliant.
Billy: I can do enough gyration, feet, and hip movement, in a way where people are like, "Oh, that's pretty good." But then if anyone actually knew how to dance, they'd be like —
Brian: That's not how you do it.
Billy: So, you touched on this a little bit. But what worries you about getting older?
Brian: What worries me about getting older? Losing my independence, man. My independence is everything to me. I don't want to have to rely on people to take care of me. I'm the person who takes care of people. You know what I mean? That worries me. It does. I'm not very good at letting people take care of me. My wife's helping me with that.
Billy: Is that why you've changed your diet a little bit? What was the reason for changing your diet?
Brian: I just wanted to see again what it would do, just fitness is more diet than it is. Obviously, we covered that in some of our early episodes exactly.
Billy: That kind of speaks to the scientist in you, too, because you like to experiment a little bit with things. It sounds like this changing your eating habits almost felt like an experiment. You wanted to see how it made you feel.
Brian: It is. I'm always looking for ways to get more energy out of my body. Because I have to. With the amount of stuff I do, man, I work full time still. We're putting the show together. So, I work until 11 o'clock midnight, almost every night. Then on weekends, I get to go have a little fun for a few hours. You know what I mean? It's that kind of thing. So, I'm always looking for ways to make sure my machine works as good as it can. You know what I mean? So, I have to feed it right and take care of it. I do so it does what I want it to do.
Billy: How much longer do you see yourself in this president role that you have at your company?
Brian: As long as they need me. I enjoy what I do.
Billy: Because your owner is an older gentleman.
Billy: And he's still in the office most days, I think.
Brian: He's in part time. Yeah, exactly.
Billy: As older owners will do, maybe they stick their nose in some things, be like, "Hey, how's it going over here? Is everything good?" They just want to be involved, really.
Brian: They just want to be involved, yeah.
Billy: This is probably their baby.
Brian: It totally is. That's the case with Jim. In fact, he said to me this morning, he's like — because he came back to the office recently. We gave him an office again, basically. Because we're like, "Come on back. You still have a lot of great ideas." We could use the experience, frankly. He just said to me — I think this morning or yesterday — Boy, it's good to be back in the office and have interactions again, and be doing stuff, and accomplishing stuff. Because that's what he's done his whole life. You know what I mean? Then he retires for a while. He's like, "Oh, maybe I should get back, be involved." You know what I mean?
Billy: Do you think you're going to be one of those people who works until he dies? Because you have to have something to do.
Brian: I always will. Yeah, I don't ever want to retire. I'm doing what I want to do right now. As soon as I don't, I'll change it. You know what I mean? If you're not doing what you want to do, make a practical plan to get where you want to be. Talk to Billy. If you're listening to this, he can point you in the right direction if you don't know how to do that.
Billy: Well, I'll point you in the right direction now. You can contact Greg Scheinman, The Midlife Male, Episode 41. He actually has a new book coming out. You can check that out, or you can go to Brian Gallagher. You can follow him on Instagram @simplemanguide. He has a program coming out, too. What episode is that? I think that's Episode 63. It's amazing how I have all these in my head, that I can just recall.
Brian: That's what I'm saying. Billy has done all the work on this podcast, so you don't have to worry about the quality suffering, people. The librarian is still behind the desk.
Billy: I want to know how many episodes is going to take before they start to blur. Because I could rattle off every episode 1 through 70.
Brian: Maybe you're like Marilu Henner.
Billy: Who's Marilu Henner?
Brian: She was on Taxi. She's an actress who remembers where she was ever, and what she did every single day of her life.
Billy: Oh, interesting.
Brian: She's a really fascinating person. Look up Marilu Henner.
Billy: I will.
Brian: She was on the show Taxi back in the late '70s and '80s. She's done the other stuff acting-wise, but she has a photographic memory and remembers every day. She can tell you. If you go February 15 2009, she'd go, "Yeah, it was a Wednesday as I recall. It rained at four o'clock."
Billy: Oh, that's wild.
Billy: If it's in sequence, which is why I want to help people with daily planning, I do well with sequences. So, if you do struggle out there with sequences, or you need some structure, let me know. I'll help you for free here. Get me while I'm cheap, is what I'm saying. Get me while I'm cheap. Because once I get good at this, I'm going to start charging exorbitant prices.
Brian: The value is here people, right now. Look, Billy, there's two airplanes we can see now, the same time.
Brian: It makes me want to get back on a plane and head to Korea as soon as possible.
Brian: Three... Holy shit. There's another one.
Billy: I love it. I love it. It's a sign. They're signs. They're all signs.
Brian: Sign, sign, everywhere a sign.
Billy: I saw the sign.
Brian: That's so 90s.
Billy: That's 90s, yeah.
Brian: That's 90s. Thank you.
Billy: So, let me ask this. How will feeling happy, healthy, and love — which is our tagline — look differently to you in the next decade of life?
Brian: I don't think it's going to look much different. I think I'm headed in the right direction, and I'm going to continue to pursue this. The past 10 years, I think, were the the big one for me. That was raising kids, though. You can't do much when you're raising kids, young kids. That was the decade of raising children. Now that I'm out of that, I'm going to go have fun again. You know what I mean? That was partially responsible why I wasn't playing a lot these past couple of years or hadn't done this earlier. It's just you have to leave time, especially young children, how important it is in the early, early stages of childhood to be there and be involved and be a part of the child's life. That's still important during the teenage years, but it's not formative like the the younger years.
Billy: 10 years from now, when we're doing this episode again — and you're 59 — on the precipice of 60, what is it that you want for your boys? I mean, obviously, you've said you want them to be happy. How do you think the dynamic between you and your boys is going to shift in the next 10 years? Because you're going to have one or two of them out of the house by that point, and the youngest is going to be getting close to driving.
Brian: I hope to be friends with them, and I hope they're happy. Those are the only two criteria I have. I hope they're happy, and I hope we're friends.
Billy: When you say friends, some people will balk at that as parents. What do you mean by that? Because sometimes they'll say they want to be a friend, but they don't want to be a parent. What do you mean by that? Just so that people who feel that way are like, "Oh, God. He's one of those dads that wants to be friends with his kids."
Brian: Not at all. I think you mentioned they'll all be out of the house at 18. That's a different kind of interaction. Parenting, that's a more friend, consigliere type relationship. Okay? When you're rearing children and I'm responsible for them, that is a parenting relationship. I do not expect to be good friends with my children right now, because I'm a disciplinarian. I have to raise them properly. That's not happening right now.
When they are adults, our interaction must change, people. Get that. I'm not going to have the same conversations I have with my five-year-old that I have when he's 21. At that point, I hope we're friends, and I can offer valuable advice as a friend at that point. What more could you ask for out of a parent? To become one of your best friends after that, after a parenting experience — that's incredible. That's what I'm shooting for.
Billy: It's so funny that you put it that way. Because when I think about it, in my 20s, especially, my dad and I would go to the bar together all the time. He was like a go-to when I would go home. I wouldn't even call my friends that lived back in the area. I just really like my dad and I are going here. If you want to meet us up, meet us here. But I didn't make it a point to go meet them. I was like, "Hey, Dad, let's go out."
Brian: So, you guys have achieved that, I guess.
Billy: Yeah. What's interesting though is, I think as we've gotten older, we've grown apart just because I think I have different things that I want to do. I have different interests. I don't like sitting around and drinking at the bar anymore, that sort of thing. That doesn't appeal to me, and it really doesn't appeal to him either. I feel like we've just diverged. We don't have the same interests. So, now it has been harder to find common ground as I reach my mid 40s, and he reaches his mid 70s. Whereas what's interesting is, when he and I were going to the bar when I was 25, he was only 10 years older than what I am right now. It's so weird to me to think that I'm 45. When he was 45, I was 15. But when I saw him, I don't know, it felt older. It just feels like I'm so much younger at 45 than my dad was at 45. But the reality is, probably not.
Brian: Let me ask you this, though. Was he ever a disciplinarian for you, or were you guys pretty much always friends?
Billy: No, you definitely — there was a high level of respect, very much like what you and your boys have. He was a consigliere. He absolutely guided me, and he gave me a lot of leeway. But because he did that, I didn't want to lose that trust with him. So, it was important for me to follow the rules. The more I followed the rules, the more leeway I got. Because I had a curfew. The curfew was midnight. But his thing was, if you can't be home by midnight, you have to call. You have to call. That is the big thing. Sometimes I'd be like, "I might not be home until two." He's like, "Check in every half hour, check in every hour. I just want to know where you are. I just want to make sure that you're safe, and I want to know when you're coming home. So, let me know."
Brian: That's what we got, too.
Billy: Yeah. So, I feel like the more I built up trust with him, the more leeway I got. I don't know. Maybe if he was here, he could speak to this. But I don't think there was ever a time when I really broke his trust. I think that was just because I had that level of respect, that I think your boys probably have with you, too.
Brian: Cool, man.
Billy: Yeah. So, we'll get you out of here on this. When you were 47, you bought a bus and turned it into a skoolie. When you were 48, you launched a new band. What's next for Brian on the Bass?
Brian: Well, this band is going to take up the next couple years. Next year is going to be fun, because we'll have the show done. We have experienced a lot of pretty cool moments on stage, so far. And now we know what works. So, all we're doing is putting more into what we know works. So, it's going to be a lot of fun. The show is going to be great. It's already great. But next year, it's going to be worth seeing. We have a lot of fun, and we hope everybody who sees it does too.
Billy: I'm excited for you, man. It's been so much fun to watch this band unfold, especially going to the practice sessions. Those were good. But the show where it's at now is fantastic.
Brian: Thank you, thank you. Just wait. We are going to triple and quadruple the jaw droopiness of the show coming up here. We've got some pretty cool ideas. We are fortunate to know a lot of clever people that help us, and we thank all of them. It's just unbelievable how fortunate we are with the great network we have of folks that help us out, too. I just want to say thanks to everybody. I don't want to start being like, here's what I know, that kind of stuff. But I just want everybody to know that there's a lot of people that are helping us. We're not doing this on our own, and I appreciate all of them.
Billy: Yeah, man. I just want you to know how much I so appreciate all the support and love that you have shown me in doing this podcast together. Because, like I said, it would have never started if I didn't have a co-host, because I didn't know what direction I want it to go. Now that I have a direction with it, I'm on to the next challenge, which is doing this program with Jill Dahler. I was stuck there, too. I didn't know how to get it off the ground by myself. So, that's why I reached out to Jill. I was like, "Do you want to do this together?"
I think, if anything, I hope people take away that if you have an idea and you don't know where to start, find somebody who's on the same energy level, on the same wavelength as you, someone who's going to prop you up, someone who's going to support you, and someone who's going to say, "Hey, man. I got you all the way. I'm going to support you with it, and we're going to do this together. We're going to have some fun," and surround yourself with those people. That is what has kept the show going. Brian, all of your love and support to me as we continue to grow the show and as I take this on my own, I just want you to know how much I love you, man. You're the best. I appreciate it.
Brian: You too, buddy. Thanks, pal. I feel the same way. This has been an honor to be here with you, and I've enjoyed it. I mean, the reason I was doing it is basically just to have fun with you, to tell you the truth.
Billy: And it's been a lot of damn fun.
Brian: I know, and you know what? It has not disappointed, my friend. It's been a really good ride.
Billy: So, next week we're going to have fun with one last returning guest, our good friend, the always entertaining, the Rubenesque, Matt Hazard. Because we need to close out this Summer Session with a quick recap with him. We got to ride out into the sunset guns blazing. So, we're going to bring Matt Hazard onto the show. It's going to be a good time. It's going to be three dudes just sitting around and enjoying each other's company. Join us, if you will. Maybe we'll make it a live or something like that, where people can join in the moment.
Brian: A special event. Oh, we should do that.
Billy: Yeah, maybe we'll try to do that here. Something to look forward.
Brian: We'll have call ins. Yeah, we will record it, but we'll record it with calling guests.
Billy: That could be fun.
Brian: We can do that.
Billy: We'll work on that. Make sure you listen and tune in. Follow us on Instagram @mindful_midlife_crisis or the web page at www.mindfulmidlifecrisis.com. That way, you can find out how you can call in to the show if we decide to do that. Because that is a brilliant idea. Yet again, Brian on the Bass hits us with a brilliant idea. My friend, I love you so much. Thank you for being part of the show. For Brian, this is Billy. Thank you for listening to The Mindful Midlife Crisis. May you feel happy, healthy, and loved. Take care, friends.